Peace - Nothing Else Makes Sense and Justice - Nothing Else Matters

Peace - Nothing Else Makes Sense and Justice - Nothing Else Matters
Dilution is NOT the solution to radioactive pollution: THAT is delusion. NO and NO.KNOW.NO! NUKES PLEASE: Drawing light on the Beauty of Diversity ~ Taking every last and first thing literally figurativelly through the eyes of MzDiagnosed Autism Spectrum erroneously viciously forced by lockdown that 70s style to take the Deadly Rx T-Rex thus given the Manic Depressive Bipolar it's a syndrome folks no joke. Seaing everything personally symbolically synchronicitealeafly...and No More Freaking Frack Freaks!!! ∃volv∃ is Lov∃ Spwelled Backwards

Wednesday, October 12, 2016

Nature Walk

A Walk Through the Woods
A walk in the woods, pine sap sticking to your skin
rushing air through the trees, the leaves falling

chick-a-dees singing their sweet silly songs
out in the woods there is nothing wrong

hugging a tree reaching into the sky
feels so right, never have to ask why

rustling through fallen leaves cane in hand
accompanied by a merry canine band

this is where we're meant to be
me, the canines, with the trees

water rushing through the brook
beauty everywhere you look
Brook

Friday, September 16, 2016

Sunday, August 28, 2016

No Longer Conned by Don, 'Zen Gardner' Revealed

Zen Gardner's Cult of Betrayal

we see you now, don/zen
7/20/2020 update
I took this post down because I didn't want to be reminded of Zen Gardner aka Don Ferguson.  But he's been slithering back into the blogosphere lately.  Activist Post put a video of him conversing with someone up yesterday.  So I feel compelled to put this back up.  Kathleen Stillwell, whose blog was removed last year, is back up with Don's writings featured.  ++++++++++++++++++++++



It was the contributors to the Zen Gardner, (aka Don Ferguson) site that drew me in.  Many interesting and caring commenters were also drawn to the site.  (Moths to a flame.)  It felt like community.  A safe one, (not).  I found myself caring about many of them, learning more about them and truly feeling a connection with other people there.  Found many cool bloggers to follow there.  I still do care about them, but it is sad, if there are any real commenters left who remain there being continually taken in by Zen, or Don, or whatever his name is. I hear he's been abandoned, and is masquerading as commenters on his own site. 

I have imitated that trait.  Online I am both Adaline and Pandora.  As a 'web designer/developer' I learned to have several email accounts in different browsers to test website functionality in each browser.  Rudely booted out of the job market after 2008 like so many others, now I like to argue with myself in the comments.  It's silly, and perhaps obnoxious but I've always argued against myself with Gemini as the sun-sign, and it cracks me up.  It may seem strange but I find it useful to doubly support favorite artists in some cases, for example on youtube.

I also learned a ton from that community and am grateful for it.

Conned by Don

I was sickened when I heard.  If zen/don had come clean about his past in *the beginning* of his blogging, this whole public shock could have been avoided.  It would have been the honorable thing to do, come clean when he started blogging.  Instead, he went on to develop a following, which is a huge responsibility.  But he kept his past secret.  Lots of folks mistakenly trusted him.  But zen/don did not reveal his past willingly.  Instead, he only 'came clean' (lame) because he was *forced to do so* or be outed by Steve Seymour @ Philosophers Stone,  'The Cult of Zen Gardner: A Monster in Disguise' http://www.philosophers-stone.co.uk/?p=13298  Zen/don did not write his con-fession of his own free will.

In Shock

To think that I supported, trusted, (with so many others,) liked and respected the writings of this zen/don Ferguson who turns out to be one of lies and deceit, and god forbid with a past 27 year career in a cult rife with abuse and pedophilia.  I felt ill for days after reading Steve's revealing Philosopher's Stone article and on down the rabbit hole, of what the Children of God (COG) cult was all about, which included suicide as means of escape for some.

Zen/don was in the COG cult for a whopping 27 of his adult years, rising in ranks to a leadership position as Image Manager.  Does that sound like a victim?  I think not.  It's the fact that he concealed his past.  So he did public relations for a cult that physically and sexually abuses children, (driving some to suicide.)  Did he not read the publications of his own cult?  In his position he must have.  It is hard to believe him when he claims that he was not aware of these fatal facts.  And that later in his career there he says he did become aware of some of the abuses, and he claims he tried to help, but exactly how?  Where is some evidence proving he tried to help victims?  It is impossible for me to believe him at all any more. 

Community or Cult

For many of the die-hard commenters there at zengardner.com the site seemed the only social life they had with like-minded people.  I signed up to receive added comments to the evasive posts My Missing Years (and the following All the World's a Cult) and there were those still holding on to that place, praising and forgiving and thanking him, taking what he wrote at face value.  Many others who have pointed questions are finding their comments are being moderated out.  Shut that site down.

Rude Awakening

Admittedly, commenting on that site, was the first online community that I had ever felt I was a part of.  'Zen' was a pen-name, that seemed obvious and ok.  But now in the ugly glare of 'zen/don's' being forcibly outed, what is most upsetting for me about losing that venue is losing them.  Most are realizing the truth behind this sociopath posing as a Truther.  His new cult to lead, disbanding.

Through the Deception

Before the reveal, some had already seen through at least part of zen/don's deception.  If only he had come on to the blogging scene clean, with full disclosure.  He would have avoided all this pain.  But he had to deceive, which only leads to unraveling.  I don't feel stupid at this point.  He bamboozled a lot of highly intelligent, successful truther speakers/activists/bloggers.   To think I looked up to this sociopath, makes me cringe. I've been wiping any links to his site off of this blog.  Hope I didn't miss any.

Depth of Devastation

We will never know the depth of devastation that the COG cult perpetrated. Many that did manage to escape only to struggle with isolation and suicidal depression. The suffering spans generations.  I wish their suffering to end and send them healing and peace.

So zen/don did not reveal his past on his own, and when he (was forced) to, he took the stance of victim, and continues to do so.  Forced revelation is betrayal. He is supposed to be a Truther, but he can't stop concealing.  That is just so wrong.

I will however, keep an open mind when evidence shows itself, truth always comes out. 

It would be cool if any of the COG cult survivors that knew him would speak up, have you come across any who write on the web?  It may answer a lot of questions.  Bring truth to what he continues to evade. The continuance of dishonesty by withholding the truth is unforgivable.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

by Chautauqua @ Augureye Express:
What's Growing in Zen's Garden | http://augureye.blogspot.com/2016/08/whats-growing-in-zens-garden.html     '...Truth is never honored by protecting it with a wall of lies.  The TRUTH needs no protection ~ The truth points to itself.'

When Heroes Fall | http://augureye.blogspot.com/2016/08/when-heroes-fall.html

by Steve Seymour @ Philosophers Stone:
The reveal:  The Cult of Zen Gardner: A Monster in Disguise | http://www.philosophers-stone.co.uk/?p=13298   'If I were to remain silent, I'd be guilty of complicity.'

David Icke's Official Forums > Main Forums > Exposing Child Abuse > What the hell is going on with Zen Gardner?   https://forum.davidicke.com/showthread.php?t=310492


finding a use for his book
∃ ~ ♬ ♪ ♥ ∞ ☮ ★ ☄ | ☄ ★ ☮ ∞ ♥ ♪ ♬ ~ ∃

ps, here's my comment getting censored on his site 9/3/2016:


and another attempt at commenting, with date/time stamp, that was censored out:






Monday, December 14, 2015

Ode to 'Exentrifugal Forz', by Frank Zappa

we mizz you, muzical geniuz
The clouds are really cheap
The way I seen 'em thru the ports
Of which there is a half-a-dozen
On the base of my resorz
You wouldn't think I'd have too many
Since I never cared for sports
But I'm never really lonely
In my Excentrifugal Forz

There's always Korla Plankton
Him 'n me can play the blues
An' then I'll watch him buff that
Tiny ruby that he use
He'll straighten up his turban
An' eject a little ooze
Along a one-celled Hammond Organism
Underneath my shoes

An' then I'll call PUP TENTACLE

I'll ask him how's his chin

I'll fine out
How the future is
Because that's where he's been

His little feet got long 'n flexible
An' suckers fell right in
The time he crossed the line
From LATER ON to WAY BACK WHEN

lyrics by Frank Zappa http://www.zappa.com/music/official

Friday, November 20, 2015

Froggy Medicine


Life.  Survival is unstoppable, rebellion, defiance.
Universal Love.  er, Ock.tober

fire elf


cornflower indigo

blue morning glory

giant blue phlox


aperture acting up...
frogette and two carrion beatles
Frog had hatched in a plastic watering can that the weeds had grown over and hidden.  Somehow this sweet little frog survived in that plastic jug, sharing the tiny pool of water with a dead mouse.  The mouse had two orange and black beetles attached to it as it decomposed in the jug.

Discovered it while cleaning up around the yard.  Had been blessed with an unusually rainy summer, a gift to have running water all through June - September.  So much rain caused the yard to grow like crazy - a jungle of tall white asters all season, and the jug had nestled hidden.

Knew immediately just where to release the tiny buoyant critter. Where to let her go.  Cradled the watering jug carefully walking her down to a pot hole near the brook.  As she was gently freed into the clear water, it was apparent that she had not developed normally, her legs atrophied.  She floated to the surface, breathing, taking in her new surroundings.  A beautiful, clear mini-pond in the woods.  Stayed, savoring sending her love and cooing to her.  She swam under and surfaced by the edge, little sweet head popping up by some maple leaves.
C 'er sweet little head, face bobbing up under the upper left floating leaf...

Joy.  She would be okay, way out here in the boonies.

Since, she gets visits from us, a handful of little Mexican/German hounds and Cally kitty, just about daily.  Speak love and well-wishing into the pool.  There she jumps, into the water swimmingly from the side.   She is alive and well!  Joy fills green hearts...

sweet froggette



Mercury @ 29* Scorpi-or-pior-pio

Dig it.  Dig it up.  Bring it on.  Bring it into the light.  Man-o-man.
Each day, with so much joy, so much Paine.
Pluto in Capricorn, the big squares subsiding.
Bring the corruption up into the light.
Keep it coming, we can take it high and tight.
Bring it on.

Eye ♥ U, girl.  ♬ ♪   ☄
We can take it, we're tough.
Only the Universe can say when enough is enough.
Yesterday was harder without you.
Today is worse.
Tomorrow we may be together again.
But Now I'm not ready to go!

Joy is to be had around every corner
Perhaps we prefer the warmer
Dark cold damp and moldy
Warm bright Sun love unfolding

What the hell is life, anyway?
Another day, another do, another hey?
Gotta enjoy every gulp of air
Greet yet another day
Stupid smile on my face they'll never wipe off,

I love you so much I could die
But there's too much to do - don't lie
Whatever does not pill us
Heaps us stronger
∃ ~ ♬ ♪ ♥ ∞ ☮ ★ ☄ | ☄ ★ ☮ ∞ ♥ ♪ ♬ ~ ∃

And the Wind Screams Mary...to the tunes of Jimi Hendrix
And the Wind, Cries... Mary

Thursday, October 15, 2015

Book Review: The Cure for All Diseases, With Many Case Histories

Amazing woman, Hulga was.  Seems that if one can catch a disease in it's initial stages before it gets a chance to do its damage is where the Zapper is best used.  These days, with the onslaught of chemicals being perpetrated on all life on the planet, we can use all the help we can get.  However, I have used the Zapper personally, a cheap home-made version, with huge success on totally eradicating my body of a virus that I'd had since childhood.  
Salute`.

Monday, October 12, 2015

That Bastard Columbus

'nuff said...

Colonization.  Ethnocide.   Occupation.  Theft.  Subjugation.  Debt Slavery.

All satanic values.  Like WAR.  Like the profiteers in Big Pharma.

Yikes, where's my spaceship!!  Gotta get some divine help for this poor little beloved, occupied, colonized planet...



Christopher Columbus
Sebastian del Piombo 

Friday, September 25, 2015

Turmeric Tea, Apple Cider Vinegar: Cancer Fighters

Turmeric Tea

Using a nice, hot cup of tea of your choice, really any kind of tea is fine - especially your fave
  • one tsp turmeric
  • one tsp of your favorite oil  
    (any good quality oil, I recommend unfiltered extra-virgin organic coconut type oil for the immense added health benefits, or olive is good too)
  • optional: raw, unfiltered local honey to taste, or maple syrup, etc.
Voila.  The turmeric, which swells in the bottom of the cup (stir it up now, and bottom's up - to your health - salute') is jut what the 'doctor ordered.   It works!  It effectively fights cancers, either by stopping the growth, or reducing it.  It stains bright so good to be careful of that...

Vinegar: Healthy Shots

Bragg's Apple Cider Vinegar, organic, unfiltered, with 'the mother': one shot in the morning, or before bedtime, anytime!  Soothes the gut, and balances Ph of the body fights cancers, great all around healer for many, many uses...

Wednesday, September 23, 2015

True? BAH. DOOR!!! ♬ ♪ ♥ ∞

A wise man told me what that meant once...the origins of the word troubadour... too bad I didn't appreciate that kind of advice then, I was just an ignorant, stupid bitch of a kid.  A fool.

my alter ego, tempest in a teapot fool
 ∃ ~ ♬ ♪ ♥ ∞ ☮ ★ ☄ | ☄ ★ ☮ ∞ ♥ ♪ ♬ ~ ∃

But hey, I was oppositional especially to all adults, evidently, because I was raised to be truthful, and I didn't like what I was seeing in life, what was happening to people around the war torn world, and to the environment, in the name of Corporate and Military Power$$$$sssssss.  (and my main parent was abusive...and insane)  And in hindsight, spectrum autistic, before they had words or '?help?' for such conditions.  Treatment?  No bullshit, doublespeak, obfuscating, NO beating around the burning bush, especially the NO!!!!! Evil Warmongering Environment Destroying Darth Vader Burning Bush Family.  And legacy.  NO profits on:  No GMOs.  No pesticides.  No superfluous vaccinations with Mercury poisoning added.  No bombs.  No nukes.  No fluoride, no crap in foods, no microwave foods, toxic electronic pollution, No wireless, lead and additives in no air choking fuels, etc., etc....ugh.  And war is not healthy for children and other living things.


Music has saved lifes, thousands of times over.

People suffer from these common dis~eases due to nature and nurture.  And the precious earth, our mother, our lives blood, it's beloved crust, our environment is in fact, our nature.  The dreaded manic storms are bloody hell distorted EGO disorder.

'Joy'stick

yet another mega storm
What is sick?  Being 'mentally ill', or the conventional (insane, some of them) treatment$ for it?  It is now my belief that psychotropics, especially considering those that cause 'suicidal ideation' as a side effect (and why the hell is that acceptable?)   Ok, I confess, I believe that whoever 'they' want can be manipulated remotely by any sick powers that be, to control people to kill themselves.  Suicide them.  I'm convinced.  Look at history.  We'd be surprised.

Not that I'm averse to the idea of succumbing to taking an antipsychotic to stave off, or nip in the bud, a manic episode.  I despise manic episodes.  I would take being down for at least a weekend, and sick for a week to prevent mania.  It can be so destructive.  Yet another one this last summer, triggered by insomnia, and terrible ptsd-ridden memories of my second husband devolving into what became evident was truly horrendous, advancing alcoholism.  'Don't let a thief in your mouth to steal your brain', or your ticker.  He was so cool...what the hell happened to him.  That's a different story.

This summer was horrendous.  I had a painful benign mass removed from a sensitive spot, the naval.  I know, ha ha.  Contemplating my navel, etc.  But I'm ashamed to show my face.  My life is in ruins, a wreck, once again.  This last episode was as bad as when I was 17, only minus the traumatic hospitalisation...get me out of this dimension, off this planet, where's my spaceship, etc.  There is too much suffering.